I’ve been a fan of the “You’re the Boss” blog ever since Bruce Buschel (of 100 Rules for Servers fame) joined several years ago. Maybe the more accurate thing to say would be that I’m a fan of Bruce Buschel, so I occasionally read the blog.
Last week, though, I accidentally clicked on a piece by another contributor, and it floored me:
One person has stuck with me all of these years. About 10 years to be exact. I almost never talk about him; I can barely stand to think about him. It is not that he was the worst employee I ever had. He wasn’t. It wasn’t that he caused me the most grief. He didn’t. It isn’t that I am mad at him. I’m not. Actually, I have been mad at myself — or embarrassed with myself — for getting into a situation that ended badly.
From what I remember, there was no ugly screaming (maybe a little). It was more like a sad divorce where the parties just go their separate ways … What seemed like a good idea wasn’t.
I have been on the other side of this kind of parting before, and though (unlike the young man in question) I still believe I didn’t deserve it, I can sure sympathize with what Goltz says about the person being “stuck” with you. There’s something unsettling about a relationship that ends in this way, whether or not it was fair or expected.
Another interesting side note: the offending party’s ability to apologize figured prominently in the closure of this situation. This test provides some great examples of phrases NOT to use when trying to make things right.